Grace Chapter 3; verse 7-17
7. And, verily have I been to the fabled land of thrift shop T-shirts.
8. And I saw that it was filled with all matter of color and stripe.
9. And although it appearth to be brimming over with the gifts of the Lord, thy bounty overfloweth to the dresser drawers as well.
10. Yet I looked upon it without fear, but with resolve and courage that mine minion would moveth ye mountain back to its source. And then when the crescent moon shown in the sky, the seal of the closet of shoes would be broken.
11. And verily, in time, the 46 bars of soap would be consumed by the waters of the holy well.
12. And so for comfort, all of the sons and daughters of the land adorned themselves in their finest and did make the arduous trek to the land of Steinmart., which parking lot was arid and hot, but the market was as an oasis in the desert. And all manner of tribes did come to bargain.
13. Where at the souk thy merchants sold glorious and wondrous wares as not to have been seen in all the land. Except in the kingdom of China.
14. And on sale, even.
15. This strange land was filled with women whose hair was the color of the sky, and some had three, or even four limbs to walk upon.
16. Here in this land, the male warriors waited upon their women and lifted thine eyes unto the sky, devoutly praying that not all of their drachmas would be parted from them,
17. But that some would remain in order to buy a goddamn beer at thy next meal.
Monday, November 2, 2015
Tuesday, September 29, 2015
The second biggest Fucktard I have met through treatment
Dear Ms. Jane Doe:
Pursuant to my e-mail dated July 30, 2015,
I still require the names of the persons who provided my radiation treatment at the XYZ Facility Radiation Oncology Department.
I examined your brief curriculum vitae on Linkedin & saw that you attended both Rutgers University and Bryn Mawr College.
Considering this, I thought I might be able to provide some assistance in completing this task.
First, let us consider the word "Name"; now perhaps you missed the third grade, and were admitted to these schools by some other merit, (my imagination runs wild here), or perhaps you were too economically challenged to purchase an English language dictionary, so let's look at the definition:
NAME (noun): 1. A word or set of words by which a person, animal, place, or thing is known.
Now let's use it in a sentence. "The blonde woman named Jane has violated HIPPA regulations."
Here's another example: "Jane Doe, an employee of the XYZ Facility Radiation Oncology Department is-- and I quote Jon Stewart -- engaging in 'premeditated institutional bullshit designed to obscure and distract'." (You may wish to examine the previous sentence to note the correct use of a quote within a quote; you may also take note that this is a compound sentence that contains the proper use of the "dash", which is distinguished from a hyphen because it serves in place of a parenthetical phrase rather than linking two words together, such as "stupid-c**t".)
“PROVIDE” [(verb) 1. to make available for use,] my record as mandated by law.
Please obtain & provide the required records POSTHASTE (I'll leave you to discover the meaning of this word -- hint, it's an adverb); or I shall seek legal council against both you, the physician you work for, as well as that very special and renowned facility that you are employed by.
Have a nice day.
Pursuant to my e-mail dated July 30, 2015,
I still require the names of the persons who provided my radiation treatment at the XYZ Facility Radiation Oncology Department.
I examined your brief curriculum vitae on Linkedin & saw that you attended both Rutgers University and Bryn Mawr College.
Considering this, I thought I might be able to provide some assistance in completing this task.
First, let us consider the word "Name"; now perhaps you missed the third grade, and were admitted to these schools by some other merit, (my imagination runs wild here), or perhaps you were too economically challenged to purchase an English language dictionary, so let's look at the definition:
NAME (noun): 1. A word or set of words by which a person, animal, place, or thing is known.
Now let's use it in a sentence. "The blonde woman named Jane has violated HIPPA regulations."
Here's another example: "Jane Doe, an employee of the XYZ Facility Radiation Oncology Department is-- and I quote Jon Stewart -- engaging in 'premeditated institutional bullshit designed to obscure and distract'." (You may wish to examine the previous sentence to note the correct use of a quote within a quote; you may also take note that this is a compound sentence that contains the proper use of the "dash", which is distinguished from a hyphen because it serves in place of a parenthetical phrase rather than linking two words together, such as "stupid-c**t".)
“PROVIDE” [(verb) 1. to make available for use,] my record as mandated by law.
Please obtain & provide the required records POSTHASTE (I'll leave you to discover the meaning of this word -- hint, it's an adverb); or I shall seek legal council against both you, the physician you work for, as well as that very special and renowned facility that you are employed by.
Have a nice day.
Monday, September 28, 2015
Cancer Treatment Centers all suck
I am not a doctor.
I am not a lawyer.
The following is based on my personal experience and are my personal thoughts for the cancer patient who will be receiving radiation treatment. Get your own legal counsel before utilizing any of these ideas.
Okay, I don’t have the time to give you the run-down on each and every facility that has discounted my opinion, pushed me into treatments I did not want, and generally, but oh, so sweetly, told me to “shut up and like it” and THEN screwed me with a double helix, but let me tell you about one in particular. (See “Legal Counsel Advises Against Naming Names", below.
So, after being radiated into kingdom-come, when I asked for my medical records under the HIPPA laws, I received some, then I asked again, and got some more, but the specifics were incomplete. Doctor did not perform the radiation sessions, and yet, there it is plain as day: "Ordered by Doctor; performed by Doctor". Then I asked again and received in the US Mail a great big package of everything they already sent me. I kept asking in writing until the light-bulb went off that I was being hosed. (Okay, I’m a slow learner, but it might be the chemo brain.)
So, my friends, some thoughts:
#1 What’s the deal with paying your co-pay before receiving service? Why would you pay for a service that has not even been rendered? I’m arguing right now with my insurer because so help me god(s) at the last visit, the nurse weighed me, took my temperature and the doctor came in and asked me how I was feeling. I do not consider this a medical service. My gramma can do this. So I ain’t paying it. I can take my own damn temperature, I know how much I weigh, and I feel just fine, thankyouverymuch.
#2 Find out WHO will be your ACTUAL RADIATION PROVIDER before you receive services. If it won’t be the physician, get the names of the actual hands-on tech(s) or nurse(s). Look up their credentials at the American Registry of Radiologic Technologists first https://www.arrt.org/Registration/Verify-Credentials to see if they are even legally allowed to touch you.
#3 BEFORE YOU LEAVE THE FACILITY AFTER TREATMENT or CONSULTATION
Get a full and complete document of who, what where and when the service was provided. And I mean if a nurse so much as sticks a thermometer in your ear (used to be mouth back in my day) it damn well better be documented.
Not just a receipt for your co-pay, but DETAILS. They have computers. If you need to wait for them to do the data entry, wait.
Finally, if you ask for your records, and they don’t provide them to you, or stall you, or pretend they can’t find them, or are just dicking you, (because that’s the small print in their Mission Statement), you can look up this website and learn more. (See how I legally squirmed out of that one?) http://www.hhs.gov/ocr/office/index.html
Because believe you me, if I don’t go down by “death by cop” it’ll be a goddamn miracle, because I want to haul this MD’s ass into the street and stick a Smith & Wesson .44 Magnum spin gun in his mouth and ask the punk if he feels lucky.
I am not a lawyer.
The following is based on my personal experience and are my personal thoughts for the cancer patient who will be receiving radiation treatment. Get your own legal counsel before utilizing any of these ideas.
Okay, I don’t have the time to give you the run-down on each and every facility that has discounted my opinion, pushed me into treatments I did not want, and generally, but oh, so sweetly, told me to “shut up and like it” and THEN screwed me with a double helix, but let me tell you about one in particular. (See “Legal Counsel Advises Against Naming Names", below.
So, after being radiated into kingdom-come, when I asked for my medical records under the HIPPA laws, I received some, then I asked again, and got some more, but the specifics were incomplete. Doctor did not perform the radiation sessions, and yet, there it is plain as day: "Ordered by Doctor; performed by Doctor". Then I asked again and received in the US Mail a great big package of everything they already sent me. I kept asking in writing until the light-bulb went off that I was being hosed. (Okay, I’m a slow learner, but it might be the chemo brain.)
So, my friends, some thoughts:
#1 What’s the deal with paying your co-pay before receiving service? Why would you pay for a service that has not even been rendered? I’m arguing right now with my insurer because so help me god(s) at the last visit, the nurse weighed me, took my temperature and the doctor came in and asked me how I was feeling. I do not consider this a medical service. My gramma can do this. So I ain’t paying it. I can take my own damn temperature, I know how much I weigh, and I feel just fine, thankyouverymuch.
#2 Find out WHO will be your ACTUAL RADIATION PROVIDER before you receive services. If it won’t be the physician, get the names of the actual hands-on tech(s) or nurse(s). Look up their credentials at the American Registry of Radiologic Technologists first https://www.arrt.org/Registration/Verify-Credentials to see if they are even legally allowed to touch you.
#3 BEFORE YOU LEAVE THE FACILITY AFTER TREATMENT or CONSULTATION
Get a full and complete document of who, what where and when the service was provided. And I mean if a nurse so much as sticks a thermometer in your ear (used to be mouth back in my day) it damn well better be documented.
Not just a receipt for your co-pay, but DETAILS. They have computers. If you need to wait for them to do the data entry, wait.
Finally, if you ask for your records, and they don’t provide them to you, or stall you, or pretend they can’t find them, or are just dicking you, (because that’s the small print in their Mission Statement), you can look up this website and learn more. (See how I legally squirmed out of that one?) http://www.hhs.gov/ocr/office/index.html
Because believe you me, if I don’t go down by “death by cop” it’ll be a goddamn miracle, because I want to haul this MD’s ass into the street and stick a Smith & Wesson .44 Magnum spin gun in his mouth and ask the punk if he feels lucky.
Thursday, January 29, 2015
Legal counsel advises against naming names
But we'll just say this letter is going out to the CEO of a revered Philadelphia Medical Teaching/Ivy League Uiversity.
Dear X:
I am a 53 year-old female who completed a course of radiation therapy for breast cancer by Dr. X, located at the XYZ Hospital campus. After this treatment, my primary care physician ordered a dexa scan, which I had done at the end of last year.
Not only did the scan reveal oestopenia, but it also revealed full blown osteoporosis of my spine. Basically my spine is a now a fucking breadstick.
The treating radiation physician NEVER ordered a baseline dexa scan before radiation therapy and the ONLY counseling about the (oesto) side effects were, and I quote, “There might be some accelerated osteoporosis”. Hardly enough information to make an informed decision. Of course, it is possible that this condition may have existed before treatment, but without a baseline, there is no way to know. I believe that you, your legal team, and your doctors have conspired together to exclude this important test in the initial intake because it would provide the patient with something to compare with the final results.
Because now I am a goddam cripple and I can't prove it was caused by the radiation. But we all know it is. A spine doesn't turn into a Pixie-Stick all by itself in six weeks.
Your doctors need to provide their patients with a FULL AND COMPLETE written description of the spectrum of side effects/results of the radiation treatment with two at the bottom, then have the patient should then initial which choice s/he has made: "I have read and understand the risks of this treatment and consent to this treatment. And 2) "I have read and understood the risks of this treatment and decline to receive this treatment. SIMPLE. Make sure the patient understands what the worst possible scenario might be and let s/he decide, not some patronizing Dr. Ego who only views his patients at numbers and income generators. (At one consult with the M.D., he spent more time telling me about his satisfying and illustrious career and wine tasting activities then he did inquiring about my current condition.) I hope this ass-hat chokes on his "Torbeck 2009 Select".
When I was tattooed before the procedures, I asked the healthcare personnel how they may be removed. I was told: "They can just be lasered off." I repeated the question and was given the same response by another clinician. After treatment was completed I asked the MD when I can have them removed; he told me they were to remain permanently, and that only one of his patients had ever had them removed. He told me: "I'm sorry you were mis-informed." My response was: " Your staff either lied to me, or they don't know what the hell they're doing -- which is it?" His second response was the same as the first.
Finally, this doctor carpet bombed me with so much radiation so intensely that several weeks after I had the skin expander/implant switch, I developed Pyoderma Gangenosum--a differential diagnosis that took FIVE specialists to diagnose. And you can bet that none of them were affiliated with your fine Ivy League teaching hospital. I may never have another chance at breast reconstruction, you assholes.
And by the way, because of the treatment for PG, none of the tattoos are anywhere near where they were when they were placed. So yeah, they're coming off, jerk.
Your witch doctors had better learn to improve on INFORMING patients before they perform their voo-doo. But I strongly suspect that they will not do so, because your management has instructed them not to because some patients might actually not choose this treatment (which has aged my body at least 5 years) and it would affect your bottom line.
Should I ever have a recurrence of breast, or any cancer, you can be goddamn sure I will NEVER go back to XYZ Oncology Radiation for treatment. And I assure you that I will tell any and everyone who inquires about this physician to run, not walk, from this condescending, egotistical, “award-winning” peckerwood.
Dear X:
I am a 53 year-old female who completed a course of radiation therapy for breast cancer by Dr. X, located at the XYZ Hospital campus. After this treatment, my primary care physician ordered a dexa scan, which I had done at the end of last year.
Not only did the scan reveal oestopenia, but it also revealed full blown osteoporosis of my spine. Basically my spine is a now a fucking breadstick.
The treating radiation physician NEVER ordered a baseline dexa scan before radiation therapy and the ONLY counseling about the (oesto) side effects were, and I quote, “There might be some accelerated osteoporosis”. Hardly enough information to make an informed decision. Of course, it is possible that this condition may have existed before treatment, but without a baseline, there is no way to know. I believe that you, your legal team, and your doctors have conspired together to exclude this important test in the initial intake because it would provide the patient with something to compare with the final results.
Because now I am a goddam cripple and I can't prove it was caused by the radiation. But we all know it is. A spine doesn't turn into a Pixie-Stick all by itself in six weeks.
Your doctors need to provide their patients with a FULL AND COMPLETE written description of the spectrum of side effects/results of the radiation treatment with two at the bottom, then have the patient should then initial which choice s/he has made: "I have read and understand the risks of this treatment and consent to this treatment. And 2) "I have read and understood the risks of this treatment and decline to receive this treatment. SIMPLE. Make sure the patient understands what the worst possible scenario might be and let s/he decide, not some patronizing Dr. Ego who only views his patients at numbers and income generators. (At one consult with the M.D., he spent more time telling me about his satisfying and illustrious career and wine tasting activities then he did inquiring about my current condition.) I hope this ass-hat chokes on his "Torbeck 2009 Select".
When I was tattooed before the procedures, I asked the healthcare personnel how they may be removed. I was told: "They can just be lasered off." I repeated the question and was given the same response by another clinician. After treatment was completed I asked the MD when I can have them removed; he told me they were to remain permanently, and that only one of his patients had ever had them removed. He told me: "I'm sorry you were mis-informed." My response was: " Your staff either lied to me, or they don't know what the hell they're doing -- which is it?" His second response was the same as the first.
Finally, this doctor carpet bombed me with so much radiation so intensely that several weeks after I had the skin expander/implant switch, I developed Pyoderma Gangenosum--a differential diagnosis that took FIVE specialists to diagnose. And you can bet that none of them were affiliated with your fine Ivy League teaching hospital. I may never have another chance at breast reconstruction, you assholes.
And by the way, because of the treatment for PG, none of the tattoos are anywhere near where they were when they were placed. So yeah, they're coming off, jerk.
Your witch doctors had better learn to improve on INFORMING patients before they perform their voo-doo. But I strongly suspect that they will not do so, because your management has instructed them not to because some patients might actually not choose this treatment (which has aged my body at least 5 years) and it would affect your bottom line.
Should I ever have a recurrence of breast, or any cancer, you can be goddamn sure I will NEVER go back to XYZ Oncology Radiation for treatment. And I assure you that I will tell any and everyone who inquires about this physician to run, not walk, from this condescending, egotistical, “award-winning” peckerwood.
- And I am telling all my blog readers too, always always get a second opinion no matter how highly regarded this physician and/or hospital is just do it!
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