Every advice column answer, ever.

I’ll start right off and tell you that everything that follows in this post can be applied to every life situation except etiquette questions. I’ve read enough Ann Landers, Ask Amy and Dear Margo to tell you there are only three answers to life’s big questions. And following the grand tradition of Abigail Van Buren, two of my responses ARE questions. 

So here goes:

1)      “What did you think would happen?” Or, “Hey, dumbass, you didn’t see THAT coming?” so …

2)      “How long are you going to take that shit?” Fix it or STFU. 

3)      (This one is accompanied with a quick slap to the side of the head): “Accept the fact that there are people who are different from you.”  If someone wants to shave their head and paint it blue, you go ahead and let them, and STFU about it.

Find any random letter to any random advice columnist and see for yourself.